EPISODE #62 – SEXUALITY AND PLEASUREhamza
SEXUALITY AND PLEASURE
In this episode Tim is joined by Layla Martin, founder of the VITA method and described “Headmistress of Pleasure” by Women’s Health Magazine. Layla specialises in tantric sex, combining modern science with Tantra practices in order to help people awaken their sexuality and fully become who they are.
Being driven by trauma from an early age, she was inspired to fully discover and expand her horizons to overcome her difficult past. Having found Tantra while on a trip to India, Layla has since propelled herself to being a “Sexpert extraordinaire” and is committed to sharing what she’s learned with others.
From sex and enlightenment to overcoming childhood trauma, this is a podcast that has confront one of the most uncomfortable yet most basic aspects of all humanity: how to love others while loving yourself.
In this episode you will learn and dive into:
- (5:00) – Introduction
- (13:45) – Abuse
- (18:20) – Spiritual Bypassing
- (21:00) – Hidden Trauma
- (22:00) – Reaching the G Spot
- (31:00) – Surrendering to Pleasure
- (37:00) – Connection of Sex and Cognition
- (42:30) – The Harm of Pornography
- (49:30) – Traumatising Systems
- (58:00) – Keeping on the Path
- (1:02:00) – Reconnecting with Your Self
- (1:03:30) – The Cosmic Joke
- (1:05:00) – Embodiment
KEY INSIGHTS & LEARNINGS
Circumstance does not make us, it reveals us. If you want more of anything, be it freedom, direction, confidence, clarity or just calm. To becoming more and excel, there are only 3 areas you can train to achieve this:
For some women, having an orgasm is a difficult thing to achieve. In order to, you need to surrender: not to your partner but to yourself and the feeling.
QUOTES FROM THE PODCAST
“One of the things about it [trauma] is it can also be full of pleasure, it can also be delightful. That’s something true on the trauma path; you know I also say, “One part pain and two parts pleasure.” Like you have to learn to support your nervous system to take care of yourself; it’s not how much pain you’ve released its how much you love your self right.”
“Sex is actually an expression of life; so that means that sex isn’t always just pleasurable. Sometimes in sex you cry. Sometimes in sex you actually get really creative. Sometimes it’s like you’re actually feeling really emotional and really tender. Sometimes, as someone who has experienced trauma, I’ve experienced fear before in sex, I can even experience anger. So there’s this allowance of what is.”
“When I wanted to change my reality, I could not think my way through it.”
“Every single time that you have a sexual experience you’re actually hardwiring your nervous system and your brain to experience sex that way, and a lot of us never question how we use masturbation, either now or when we were younger. And what we wired into our system: what kind of images, what kind of emotions, what kind of beliefs about sex? So self-pleasure can be a zone to find profound self-love, to find incredible creativity, to literally have spiritual states of ecstasy…”
“What I’ve had to do over time is really learn to rest with that part of myself that can be with disgust, with fear, with pain, and in that beingness, without trying to transform it or change it, when I can meet it with a depth of love and a depth of presence and a depth of acceptance, if it’s not in alignment with my truth as a human, it starts to melt or change or transform on its own.”
“It’s a similar process actually where women go into their heads more from shame and fear and their specific conditioning around sexuality, men go into their heads because they’ve been wired to experience sex as a disconnected, fantasy-based, two-dimensional reality.”